So I guess this blog is really about calling bullshit on myself. Over the last 2 years, I have started to "settle" into my life.Here's the thing, I am REALLY HAPPY! I am... but honestly, I feel like I am happily letting my brain fall asleep... no kidding. I'm not sure if it's plain laziness, slight depression maybe or what but it has got to stop.
Ok, I will never claim to be a science rocket. I graduated high school with a 3. something and have only some college classes under my belt. You will find misspellings, some bad grammar and just plain stupid things in this blog, I have no doubt, but let me give you some examples of what I mean. I posted on my facebook this "overwhelmed by my lack of patients these last few weeks... holy cow LADY calm the %$#! down 2010 was a wonderful year and 2011 is going to be better so stop it!" Well, it took a nurse friend of mine to point out that she had patients, I needed patience. Then, in normal conversation, I mentioned someones behavior was 'erotic' when I meant 'erratic', it took DAYS to figure out why that friend laughed at me . No big deal you may think but I took honors English all through high school and my freshman year of college. I have found myself confused during conversations about current events and have noticed I'm developing a fear of driving on the freeway because my husband always drives! I LITERALLY feel myself becoming stupid.
You may say, "Ok then, go back to school, get a job do something to stop it. Why are you writing about it?" Well there are two reasons; One, I use to write all the time. I really enjoyed it and I was good at it. Writing seems like a good way to get my mind going again. The second reason is, I think I LIKE being lazy. My husband lets me sleep late in the morning if I want. Hey, guess what, I want! He will make dinner if I don't want to and I hate to cook. Hell, when I told him I was feeling like I was getting stupid, he said "wow, that sounds expensive." That may sound condescending to some but really he was just saying "do whatever you want to fix it."
SO, with all that said, I have decided to change things. No more, "I was so busy with the kids" (when most moms know the kids are not ALWAYS out of hand) No more "I'm really tired" when I slept til 10am and didn't leave the house except go to the gym. I need to be more giving and less taking of my husband. I need to use the talents I was given to make a mark on this world other than my two children. I will break this fog of spoiled laziness I'm in, even if I really do like it. <3
Promise 1: Post EVERY DAY for a year! Even if it is just a quick hi and even if no one ever reads or comments on this blog
I'd love to hear your promises to yourself - Let me know!
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